Abandonning the race

After last night's session, I am officially pulling myself out of the race to 10k, because last night, I lost control.

Poker is a volatile game, there will be good nights amd there will be bad nights. Last night was really bad, and rather than book a small loss and move on, I got stuck and continued to play and play and play losing $448. That gave me a $933 loss on the week. The whole point of playing the SNGs was that it was supposed to help me eliminate those sessions from my game. In a cash game, if a bad river hits, you can get stuck rebuying over and over again. If the cards continue to go against you, you can drop a lot. Apparently, I can still let that happen for SNGs too. I played 20 games, over 4 to 5 hours, either FT or HU and placed only 5 times. I came in 4th or 5th 5 times in FT games, usually bubbling out because of a bad card. I'd be in the lead, or about to split and the river would hit and either save my opponent or cripple me. It got to me and I kept forcing.

And to put in perspective how bad it was, I was able to play 7 of those matched HU against opponents I wanted in vendo and talisain51, and went 2/5 against them. It was sick how bad the cards went against me. After losing on a variety of suck outs, I then let my game degrade to the point I was pushing with randomness even in positions I knew I was probably beat.

I'll post the full summary of the matches another day. For now, I needed to clear my mind, get it out, and get ready for the week. I'll break from poker of a few days and re-group. When I come back, it'll be for the love of the game, no longer to achieve some specific monetary target.